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tattooinggothamcity:

'its too hot to wear all black'

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(via departured)

Source: tattooinggothamcity
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  • me: im so tired, i could collapse into bed and sleep for a year..
  • me: gets in bed
  • me: how was earth created
  • me: who made microwaves
  • me: how does the internet even work
  • me: i'm hungry
  • me: feels bad about something i did 4 years ago
  • me: remembers 73 unfinished tasks
  • me: too tired to sleep
Source: oknope
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batreaux:

well, son, i deeply misunderstood your birthday request for COD but we still need to eat all this fish

(via departured)

Source: batreaux
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  • me: but it's 2 AM
  • stomach: did i fucking stutter
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breakfastburritoe:

dropping out of school to become part of a chicken nugget cult

(via departured)

Source: breakfastburritoe
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e-zekiel:

okay so today I was at the mall and this girl walking in front of me and tripped and fell and instead of helping her up like a normal person would- I decided to make her feel less embarrassed and fall down too

but I guess another guy had the same idea because we fell at the same time

and then another person fell

and another

and suddenly I was lying in the middle of an impromptu fainting mob and a lot of people were shouting

and the girl who’d originally fallen looked so fucking happy

(via departured)

Source: e-zekiel